ist - King Martha - Released 2005
Evelyn Harper
Evelyn Harper, aged 34 6/8, waits impatiently for the arrival of the number nine bus.
Fingers numb with cold and chafing beneath the precariously elongated handles
Of her overweighted shopping.
Behind her a denim-clad stranger watches in fascination as she fidgets and curses,
Before being seized with a sudden and uncontrollable impulse.
Gently, he touches her shoulder.
She turns. Their eyes lock. He opens his mouth to speak.
I know you wake up in the morning with a face like Weather Central
And a house full of belongings that amount to rentals
When the best things in life, have fallen into arrears
And there’s an ugly baby squalling in each of your ears
And you’re aching with nostalgia for that long lost journey
From the late night drink to the hospital gurney
Now you’re every second Saturday, half-lager and lime
And you’d give up everything to have your stomach pumped once last time
And that’s why I’m here
Your husband had a six-pack but he drank it watching football
Now you’re listening to him snoring sat out in the hall
With your head in your hands, and the phone off the hook
When did "The Three Little Pigs" start counting as a good book?
Now you’re slotting in sex while making soft-boiled eggs
And your idea of a joint is the arm and the leg
It costs you to live like this, so safe and so warm
You’re longing for just one kiss that doesn’t conform
And that’s why I’m here
You’ll probably regret it, for the rest of your life
You’ll be a slatternly mother and an inconstant wife
But you died long ago and, now, you need time to grieve
You don’t know me from Adam, let’s get as naked as Eve
You can come down on Ovaltine then toddle to bed
Chewing your children’s Aspirin for that hangover head
Or refuse to call time on the person you were
Cause there’s a glimmer in your eyes says I’m talking to her
And that’s why I’m here
Evelyn Harper bites her bottom lip and tried hard not to laugh.
She thinks about correcting the stranger’s utter misapprehension
When, instead, her mood shifts.
Her groceries come crashing to the ground, she leaps into his arms
And insinuates her tongue between his bewildered lips.
Ah, what the hell, she thinks.
Everybody needs to get laid.
(c) 2005 ist
Lyrics: Hall Music: Hall/Haynes/McCourt
Other Releases
Toothpick Bridge
Freudian Corduroy
EPs, Singles and Outtakes